The Bower Bird

I haven't posted here in months and I don't plan on reviving anything at the moment. However, I did resuscitate my other blog, Quietly Take To The Ship, as a home for a new poetry project called The Bower Bird.

The beloved Spaceship was sent to the hangar as I prepped for grad school and I haven't had the time or energy to drag her back out again. It will probably stay that way for the foreseeable future unless summer has other plans. We'll see. In the meantime constructing a bower of thoughts will be my primary focus and you're welcome to keep abreast of my progress. I have no idea where I'm going with it, only how I'm going about it.

Heh heh, I said "breast".

SHAMELESS, TARDY SELF-PROMOTION!!

Hey followers of haphazard bloggery, particularly those based in the Brooklyn area, come check out my band tonight, Thursday, August 6. Yeah, I said it. Mine. The other three bands that are playing are all seriously awesome and check-out worthy, but we, Warmth (or "Warmph" if you're so inclined, which I am), are opening. That means we get this party rolling and, boy, will we ever. Here's the sweet, sweet flier.

I know, I know, I should have posted this a few days ago for fair warning, but we were busy practicing! Practice is important if you want to be good at anything. Except for blogging, of course.

Thoughts to Nurse On: Torche & Harvey Milk

Now that I have secured future passage to the July 26 Torche/Harvey Milk show at MHoW, feel free to go secure your own. Last time I saw Torche was about 3 years ago at the now-defunct Siné. I recall being very impressed, but there was little to indicate at the time of what they would soon be capable. This is exciting, particularly since I'll be missing Intronaut and Kylesa next weekend. I think I've listened to at least one Intronaut song every day for the past month or so. They're gooooood.

(Also, while I'm here, apologies for the lack of posts. Little of public interest has happened to me lately.)

New Converge Track

In my roundup of the Converge/Genghis Tron show from last Friday I mentioned that Converge played two new tracks from their upcoming album. Turns out Metal Injection filmed the set and will be posting it in installments, which is pretty rad. Here's one of them, head over there to check out the rest of the set as they get it up (tee hee)...

I Found the "[pre]" Tag

Man, sometimes I can be such a pleb. Aside from the fact that my poetry is probably mediocre at best, I stopped posting my work because I was getting frustrated trying to format lines and spaces in Blogger. A few months back when this problem started to become a headache, I searched around but only found other poets' and editors' laments about the obstacles to properly formatting poetry online. Perhaps most of those complaints were old because, sure enough, today I discovered there's an html tag, [pre], that retains preformatted material. Not sure how I missed it all the times I spent looking for tags that would help me format poetry, but it definitely exists and is definitely helpful.

So as I continue to await word on whether or not I get into a master's program in the fall, I've resumed posting my better* work over at Quietly Take To The Ship.


*—I may be a curmudgeon, but I'm no Philip Larkin

Addendum to Crack the Skye

This afternoon, in between working on some posts for Tilzy.tv, I've been taking in another listen to Mastodon's latest to see what kind of effect it has on me during non-drunken weekend hours. It's not as terrible as I originally thought, and "Divinations" (the song with the awesome video) is pretty rad, but overall this is an album of filler material.

While chatting right after the first listen, I made the comparison of Mastodon to Tool, with the caveat that Mastodon was able to squeeze in one more awesome album before releasing a steaming pile of overproduced radio bollocks. I absolutely hate everything Tool released after Ænima and although I'm enjoying Crack the Skye more than Lateralus (10,000 Days was just an abomination in my book), that isn't saying much.

As I said in my initial post a lot of the vocals on here are just too saccharine and radio-safe (though I'm typing to Scott Kelly rocking on the title track and this part I do like, until the background comes in and ruins it). One thing that's apparent is that these guys are trying new things and experimenting. While that's great and ultimately necessary, I'm wondering why nobody told them that they don't have the chops to sing, nor does the vocal style they've appropriated fit with the rest of their sound.

The most egregious examples of all my issues with this album can be found in the fourth track, "The Czar". This track is little more than consumer pabulum and makes me question a lot of the decision-making of everyone involved in its production (kinda like the film Showgirls). Every track on the album (the final track, "The Last Baron", was not on any pre-release copies, so I've yet to hear it) has at least a few parts that rip, only to be pulled back down by what is presumably an experiment gone awry, but after a decent intro "The Czar" afterward fails in almost every respect.

After Blood Mountain came out it was pretty clear that Mastodon had crossed a bridge. No longer were they going to be beasts of sludgy, hardcore-influenced prog metal, but that was fine. A maturation process occured for them as a band and, though it took me a couple listens to really get into parts of that album, I really came to love it. I don't get that vibe from this latest effort at all. With a few more listens I'll come to accept it and enjoy parts of it, but overall I'm just not happy with the results. I was expecting something different, but they took some different turns than I would have.

In an email about this to my boy Wayne over at Hooks So Big I mentioned that the vocals weren't my biggest problem, but after this listen, I think they actually are. "The Czar" sucks and all, but the title track and the opener, "Oblivion" could have been fucking killer ripping tracks that were undone by shitty vocals (Scott Kelly excluded). I concluded that email to Wayne by saying this:

I NEED THEM TO ROCK ME LIKE AN AFGHAN ADULTERER not rock me to sleep. you know what album has great clean(er/ish) vocals, great melodies and harmonies and also rocks the fuck out? Enslaved's Vertebrae. i can't stop listening to that motherfucker and it keeps getting better. that's what i was hoping from mastodon and they didn't really deliver.

So I guess these are my final thoughts on the matter for a little while. As a topic of conversation this album has certainly been on many, many people's lips, which is a good thing. Intelligent disscussion about music is always a good thing, some measure of consolation here at least. I'm still torn on whether or not I want to see this performed live, but as far as I know the shows are sold out or anything, keeping my window of opportunity open lest I decide to take the leap through.

Anyway, time to put on some Morbid Angel and get back to writing for work.

2009 Is Going To Be A Kickass Music Year

If early signs are any indication of how the whole year may transpire, 2009 could turn out to be an amazing year for heavy music. I just caught Witch last week and, though it wasn't as great a performance as I would have hoped, it was a good warm up. Perhaps the economic climate is such that bands have no choice but to hit the road (which is paradoxical, since fans presumably have less money to spend at them), nevertheless they're out and they're out en masse.

I didn't get to Atlanta's Scion Rock Fest, but by all accounts it was pretty awesome. That event alone should portend good things for all things heavy, at least in the short term. If corporations are going to sponsor entertainment events, I'd much rather have them fund an event featuring the top tier of heavy music than, say, some sporting event (though what happened to Nachtmystium was stupid and unfortunate).

Anyway, here are some of the things to look forward to this year:

* Melvins silver anniversary shows
* Mastodon: new album, Crack the Skye (release March 24) and tour with Neurosis
* Converge: tour w/Coliseum & Genghis Tron. (And recording in May, from what I hear)
* Kylesa & Intronaut will be opening for The Haunted & Nachtmystium and then switching gears to open for the Mastodon/Neurosis tour!

All this will be happening between now and the end of May. The Mastodon/Neurosis/Kylesa/Intronaut shows here in NYC/BK will be an incredible birthday gift for yours truly and I'm psyched to see Converge and Genghis Tron at the end of this month. Maybe the second half of the year will suck taint, but if this first half proves as incredible as it looks on paper, then it'll take something catastrophic to render the whole year even mediocre.
~~~~~

Looks like I was completely wrong about the Neurosis thing. My mistake, I guess I misread the report from Scion.

2012 Redux

A little over a year ago I reviewed a book in these hallowed electronic pages called 2012: The Return of Quetzalcoatl. That review mainly consisted of an ad-hominem attack on its author, Daniel Pinchbeck, for which I am marginally regretful. Not because the book is good, or its ideas are worthwhile, but because I failed in my objective to shine light on a tremendous pile of stupidity and, instead, flinged mud at a messenger. At the time an opportunity arose in which I could (and should) have criticized convoluted new-age spiritual garbage, but I got lazy faced with the prospect of actually having to re-read the book to really pick it apart and expose its lack of merit.

Fortunately all I got was a weak type-lashing from the author in my comments scolding me for being a bad boy. Unfortunately, the beast has returned, new tome in hand culled from the vast storeroom of vacuity that is his website. Titled Toward 2012, it's clear Pinchbeck has a fetish and is determined to mine it for all it's worth, presumably until three years hence, when Y2K happens all over again. Dwight Garner just reviewed this for the NYTimes and, while much subtler than I in his criticisms, pretty much labels the book a steaming pile. But first he had to provide some context and so blurbed Pinchbeck's previous book thusly:

In a previous book, “2012: The Return of Quetzalcoatl,” Mr. Pinchbeck seemed to want to have it both ways about earth’s fast-approaching deadline. He didn’t entirely dismiss the possibility of Armageddon, but he used his book as an occasion to urge humanity to come together to stop global warming and heal the planet in other ways. Maybe, you know, we can head this bad juju off at the pass. Mr. Pinchbeck also wrote about crop circles, alien abductees, experiences with poltergeists, ingesting psychedelic mushrooms and practicing “new ideals of erotic freedom,” but never mind.

I read that and laughed, reminded of exactly how far removed from any rational thought this material is. The mention of "new ideals of erotic freedom" nearly made me lose my coffee all over this keyboard, since it was belittling Pinchbeck's views on that topic in particular that got me in trouble in the first place.

Seeing this review on the screen as I set myself up here at work this morning got me thinking about people close to me who go in for this sort of thing (Garner does mention "woo-woo friends" in his review). It makes me a bit depressed to know people are desperately reaching for meaning in a universe devoid of any such enduring thing and, thus, cling to outrageous anti-scientific and pseudoscientifc claims in books such as Pinchbeck's.

Just yesterday Scientific American posted a story, "Finding Control In Chaos", whose subtitle read: Feeling helpless leads to see nonexistent patterns. The article is short, I recommend reading it, but the ultimate point is that test subjects imposed fictitious order on situations in which they lacked control. I've found among people who are into new-age or vaguely spiritual "philosophies" that acute lack of control over their place in the universe and an intense desire for meaning to show its face.

This isn't a rare phenomenon by any stretch. In fact, it's probably the default human setting as far as anyone has determined. Our imaginations are a wondrous tool, but to deny ourselves the use of our rational functions is as criminal as denying our imaginations for rigid logic and order. We have the capability for dialectical thinking, for synthesizing our logical functions with our imaginative capacities. It would be to humanity's benefit for us as individuals to take advantage of this. Wallowing in shallow pools of pseudoscientific drivel and spiritual horseblather is a waste and proponents of this kind of thinking should be seen as the hucksters and contemporary snake-oil salesman they are.

Brooklyn, Friday, Jan 23

I probably won't be writing anything for a couple days because I'm prepping for this. It's gonna be awesome. Come join us if you can. It's free.

Here's a map!


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Books In Review...Sort of

A few people had asked me to do a little feature on my best books of 2008. It's a sensible request given that I work in a bookstore and sometimes post about books that I've read or am reading. Putting together a quality post about new books in the same way that's done with music is a different order altogether though. Why? Because I tend to not read new books when they come out with the same frequency that I find new music. Most of what I read during the past year was "catch-up" material, classics and whatnot that I'd never had a chance to read. I don't even bother trying to stay abreast of "new, up and coming" authors (and I'm barely able to do that with bands/musicians).

Nevertheless, I did read a couple new books this year that I really enjoyed. Both of these I did "reviews" of: 2008 Booker Prize winner Aravind Adiga's The White Tiger and Salman Rushdie's The Enchantress of Florence (I also happened to read Midnight's Children about a month ago and it surpasses the glowing review I gave to Enchantress...). The other day I started Joseph O'Neill's Netherland (which made the NY Times "Top of 2008" list) and I like what little I've read so far. I also read the first story in Jhumpa Lahiri's new short story collection Unaccustomed Earth. The prose was elegant and the story exquisitely crafted, but overall incredibly depressing and gushing with sentimentality. Not really my kind of material, though I wouldn't mind being blessed with her gift for diction.

It's really one of the paradoxes and conundrums the modern role of publishing that someone who works in a bookstore and writes doesn't really read contemporary fiction, somehow expects to have a future in this business. Then again, people seem to fall all over themselves to buy the latest David Sedaris or Chuck Klosterman or some new age claptrap or mystery/thriller pablum. I write poetry and barely anybody reads that anymore, including myself. I could hardly name you any new, worthwhile poets to check out, yet for whatever reason I hope to find myself in their company. Well, really I don't think anybody wants the company, we desire to exist on the next step above. And we all clamber like the living dead over one another to enter creative writing programs. Madness I tell you, pure madness.

One good piece of advice that I feel entitled to give, however, is "Go Read!" Seriously, go buy some books and read. Forget tv or movies or whatever for a while. We're dying a slow, agonizing death and we word-lubbers aren't going to be the only ones who rue the day publishing dies. It's the one thing I'm bound to get sentimental about.

Comments on the Society of the "Best Of..." (Kind of)

Late December is the time of year when people who write about things make up lists about the best things (or worst) things they had to write about for the previous 360 days. I'm not really going to do that because that's not something I enjoy doing. However, I am going to write about a few things I missed over the course of the year.

This mostly refers to music, as I try to keep up, but even people who make that their full-time addiction do it with great difficulty. For a great compendium of this year in metal, go check out Brandon Stosuy's "Show No Mercy" column at Pitchfork. I don't generally follow that site, but SNM is worth keeping tabs on (in this "Best of '08" he got some lists from players themselves). What follows are some of the things that either completely passed right by my broken radar or things I didn't get to say enough about earlier in the year.

Krallice. Local Brooklyn supergroup makes epic "transcendental" black metal. It has been noted elsewhere that American black metal bands tend to be much more experimental with their compositions. There's a good dose of truth to this, as they're not bogged down with the need to be "trve" or "cvlt" in a manner that hinders European outfits. I was fortunate enough to see these guys at Silent Barn in April and it was, literally, jaw-dropping. The album, which I only recently got my hands on, has rightfully made a bunch of "Best of '09" lists and is phenomenally beyond words. Here's video of them from September, when they played an empty lot in Bushwick right around the corner from my apartment (while I was at work, of course).



Nachtmystium. Speaking of American black metal, I never got around to doing a proper review when Assassins came out earlier this year. I began one and apparently forgot to finish, because I just found the unfinished and unpublished post while looking for my own link. Mea maxima culpa. When I heard Instinct:Decay I thought that was progressive for the genre, but for sheer out-of-the-box thinking their latest album surpasses that effort by quite a margin. Assassins makes no bones about being a Pink Floyd-inspired work where, in a few tracks those psychedelic overtones lead toward Kylesa territory: sludgy yet vaguely anthemic. In the final reckoning the Chicagoans produced one of the most intruiging albums I've (and others) heard in quite a while.


Enslaved. While my head was focused on books (where it's spent a great deal of the latter part of this year), Norwegian viking-prog-metal geniuses Enslaved put out Vertebrae. Very little of what these guys do nowadays could be even remotely considered "black metal" other than some vocal passages. But as far as being a progressive metal powerhouse is concerned, few outfits can match their combination of awe-inspiring harmonic beauty and intricate rhythmic changes with sheer head-banging rockness. Generally when people say a band "is maturing as songwriters" said band is just getting old and lame. Instead, Enslaved are perfecting the methods mastered by Unwound, though hopefully they continue to make amazing albums into the forseeable future. Vertebrae hasn't made the same immediate impact on me that Ruun did, but it's still a new listen and my affection is growing by the listen.


Torche. I don't think I need to say much more than what I already said here. Now you can use the time you would have spent reading to watch this live video of them that happened to be shot on my birthday. And then watch more.



Mouth of the Architect. I didn't realize it until this past week, but MOTA's album Quietly was released this year. When I got my hands on it a couple months ago I thought, for whatever reason, that it had come out last year. Not realizing how recent and relevant it was I failed to write up a proper review. These Ohioans have taken the path I wish Isis would have taken after Oceanic and may have just claimed the heavy-ambient-metal genre all for themselves (Pelican is crap and can suck it). This band is criminally underknown and deserve far more attention than I've seen them receive.


Melvins. In the grand scheme of things, as awesome as Nude With Boots is, it may not stack up as one of the best albums of the year. Then again, just because it failed to make most lists doesn't mean it wasn't awesome. I've realized lately that a good number of noteworthy albums were released this year, more than I had initially remembered. Then again, I had noted in my review Buzz's lament that this album would be overlooked as just another great Melvins record. I fear his take was all too prescient. Regardless, the ferocious 1-2 of Melvins/Big Business live continued to demolish all comers, so there's that at least.


So that's my shortlist of awesome things that happened in 2008. Here are a few other notables worth remembering:

• Dinosaur Jr live. I finally got to see my favorite band.
• At The Gates reunion tour. Incredible.
• Metallica released a pretty good album and it only took 20 years.
• Made Out Of Babies released The Ruiner which was a damn fine album.

Now I have a mission to go get a bunch of new releases that I've yet to hear and have a listening party with myself. These bands also released new stuff in 2008: Jesu, Boris, Earth, Harvey Milk, Mogwai, Electric Wizard, and Meshuggah (which most everyone says is awesome).

Here's to everyone that put out great music in 2008 and hoping for an even better crop in 2009 (Mastodon, I'm looking at you).

Happy New Year, everyone!

Something Actually Important For A Change

Hey everyone, anyone,
I just got a really encouraging phone call from my friend Tyler. A mutual friend of ours, that we've known basically our whole lives, had a bone marrow transplant a couple weeks ago and as of right now the recovery prognosis is looking good.

Most of this site is comprised of inanities. I put things I love on pedestals or take a hammer to the multitudinous, ossified towers of bullshit that I observe near daily. Rarely do I post about something liable to make me, never mind any readers, face the tremendous wrath of their bottled emotions. But now, during the high religious festival season, seems an appropriate enough time for a spiritless, religionless, anti-everything jerk like myself to celebrate something extraordinary.

I've known Jonathan Goss since I was about five years old. We played youth sports together, attended the same schools until high school graduation, even made a couple short films together. When I abandoned my hometown for greener pastures I pretty much abandoned most of the people I grew up with as well. Now, in the age of Facebook, a lot of things have come flooding back that I would have rather left in the past. Thankfully, however, I didn't learn about Jonathan from any status update. At our college reunion, Tyler (sidebar: I went to college with Tyler though met him through Jon when we were very young. Their mothers are great friends.) informed me that Jon was diagnosed with leukemia. I got sporadic updates on Jon's condition whenever Tyler knew something, for which I am truly grateful.

At some point during his ordeal this year, Jonathan started a blog based on his ongoing experience facing leukemia and his eventual need for a bone marrow transplant. Jon lives in LA now where he is building a career as a screenwriter. I still really don't have any contact with him other than reading his blog updates, which he stopped the day before his transplant. Hopefully, as he regains his strength, he'll begin writing there again, about coming through the other side of the void. He has faced the great radiation and he has done it with his trademark grin. I haven't seen the kid in almost ten years, but that grin is exactly the same.

In the time since I first heard about all this I began to feel guilty for severing so many of the ties I had to the place I grew up. I didn't so much burn bridges as I left them to decay, much like the government does with its infrastructure. Not everyone I grew up with was so provincial-minded, though most of the really great minds (and, honestly, I include myself here), left the confines and limited opportunity of small-city New England. I've found out there are a few old friends here in NYC that I've been trying to catch up with and quite a few are out in LA as well.

Tomorrow I head "home" for the holidays and, as usual, I won't be there long enough to visit with anyone who may be around. Really, I'm fine with that. I still need my distance. But more than anything, I'll be thinking about something more important than my own fucked up feelings. I'll be thinking about Jonathan, in a hospital room in Los Angeles. Too many of us blog-addicts become locked in our self-absorbed worlds, dwelling on the tree that blocks our view and failing to see the forest. Just in time for a new year I've seen the forest again and there is a Chesire grin floating amongst the branches.

So as the winter solstice passes and 2009 arrives, I invite any and all followers here to go read Jonathan's writings over at BlastCount. Besides the directed musings of a talented, growing writer, you'll see an amazing army of friends and family. They have commented on his posts and sent him wishes, blessings, many of whom probably have only the faintest connection to him, but realize that his battle makes any of ours pale. I'm sure most of you know someone who is facing a bigger battle and is in need of your thoughts, especially at this time of year.

Happy Holidays, everyone. Jonathan, we're with you, buddy.

Best Napkin Art Ever.

Last night my band played its first show in a year and a half. It's essentially a new band and we're still working out a name, though I'll have more news on that soon (along with a few demo tracks, hopefully). Anyway, there were a few hiccups last night (Violent Bullshit apparently never committed and Said Fury may just break up), but they may have just been blessings in disguise because the three of us that played ripped. A ton of people showed up, which was a bit shocking as they seemed to arrive while I played our first song with my eyes closed.

Not to toot my (our) own horn, but folks really enjoyed our set, so that's encouraging, because, frankly, we had no idea what was going to happen. MAW and ANIMAL put in stellar sets as well, so we all had a big metal-ly love fest afterwards. That was also nice because none of us seem to be able to handle compliments and things kinda get awkward, even though it's nice to hear.
However, I'm proud to post here the finest compliment of the night, courtesy of Noga and Liam:


I think we have a winning t-shirt design on hour hands.

Awesome Show Update

Exciting development(s) have precluded me from spending time posting in the manner which I would prefer, but I know you're a forgiving lot. Here's what I've been up to:

1) Got a new little gig writing blurbs for Tilzy.tv. Go check out the site, it's a growing database of web-based tv programs. They've got a pretty wide range, everything from comedy to politics and news to animation, etc. Here's one I did last week on an up-and-coming LA sketch trio, Chad, Matt & Rob. More to come on that front...

2) My band is finally playing a show. Finally! It's been a year & a half since the last time we played out. Now we have a bassist (instead of 2 guitars) and a new name. What's that name? Well, I'll have to get back to you on that. "Why," you ask? Because after taking six months to settle on one (Forfeit) our attempt at due dilligence failed miserably: there are about 15 other bands with the same name. We've got a few ideas, though. Anyway, here's the info for any loyal readers who will be in Brooklyn this Sunday:


The Charleston is on Bedford Ave in Williamsburg (btw N7 & N8, right off the L train)
$6
And for those unaware, The Charleston is one of those heavenly establishments that provide a free personal pizza with your beer purchase. Yum.

3) And if writing and practicing weren't taking up enough time, I now have a girlfriend. Yes, somebody finds me interesting and attractive (and for good reasons, too! go figure) So thanks, Andrea, for taking up all my precious blogging time! On the upside I get to have sex (hi mom, dad) and have somebody laugh at my jokes. Also, I'm relearning French. You can help me pat myself on the back later.

~~~~
update: I was supposed to give a completely unnecessary shout-out to Noga, but I got distracted by Art Spiegelman. So, Nogs, here's your shout-out. Now I have to go sticker, like, 50 books.

News From Mumbai

Just catching up on the news of the attacks in Mumbai, and given the serious nature of such events, I know it's inappropriate to make immature jokes, but c'mon NYTimes...really?

Hari Kumar contributed reporting from New Delhi.

I was not aware that White Castle was an international chain.


(I apologize sincerely that this is my first post in over a week. Regardless, enjoy your Thanksgivings, fellow Americans. I think under the circumstances a lot of us are going to be more reflective this year than in previous years.)

Hooray For Massachusetts

While we wait for the numbers to keep on a-comin', I'd like to pass on the wonderful news that my home state of Massachusetts has voted to decriminalize small amounts of marijuana for personal use. This is awesome as I fully support smoking weed and engaging in consensual acts of sodomy (California, get yr 'NO's on Prop. 8 and yous can be twins!).
So yeah, we might be assholes (zing!) but we sure are chill about it. I'll toke to that.


Also, GObama!!!!!!!!!

Election Day!

Hopefully any Americans reading this today have gone and voted (or will vote before their locals polls close). Previously I voted absentee in Massachusetts, making today my first time voting in an actual booth. A bit groggy from just waking up, I went over to the basement of PS 18 down the block, wandered around confusedly between lines and then the Voter Aides led me to the right line. I didn't know what to expect of line length, but that whole process took me 10 minutes and that includes the walk. The voting machine was weird, too. When I was a kid and "went voting" with my parents I remember going to Leominster City Hall, waiting in line for my ma or pa to get their name crossed off a giant table-sized list before wading through the labia of democracy: the boothflaps.
This New York machine was weird. It looked like an old cigarette vending machine with a giant lever on the bottom. You're supposed to put the lever in position, turn little knobs for the candidate(s) of your choosing, then pull the lever back to cast the vote(s). Such a contraption is quite different than the old Massachusetts machines from my youth. Those things were little boxes with punch cards that had to be lined up properly before casting a vote by punching the lever in the correct position. Then you bring the ballot to another desk and put it in a box. Today? No actual ballot and no box, either. Hm.
Overall, an easy process of which every eligible person should be partaking. My main gripe with American voting (besides the massive fraud of the past two Presidential elections) is that Election Day is not a national holiday. Give every person the day off (or at the very least a half-day) so that they can go cast their vote at their leisure. That people have to get up early or leave work early or skip their lunch break to go vote is stupid. Then again if everyone could vote at their leisure poor, working people would be able to vote. And you know what happens when poor people vote? Baby Jesus cries and the terrorists win again.

On that note (sorry, it's too early for me yet) get out and vote for Obama because if you vote for the old angry guy and the clearly unqualified woman you're an asshole.

Election Prediction via Intrade

Yesterday I caught my annual autumn cold so instead of heading out to friends' comedy and music shows, I stayed in and watched the VP debate. What a travesty Sarah Palin is. I'm not going to go into it, she disgusts me and is an insult to women (among other things). However, in between naps today I found myself at Intrade, the market predictor of important things. As of today there is a 70% chance that Obama/Biden win the election and these type of markets have been consistently accurate in predicting recent election winners. Getting wind of this perked me up a bit and it's worth keeping tabs on over the next 5 weeks (also, make sure you're registered to vote, you have until next Friday 10/10 to do this).

Update: "Unforgiven III"

The intro to this song is one of the lamest things I've ever heard. I was going to say one of the "gayest" songs ever. But that's not fair at all and I don't want to start a firestorm over my use of incendiary and incredibly offensive language (see what I did there?).

Also, the rest of the song sucks.

Now, "All Nightmare Long" is a good song. Listen to that one again before your ears revolt.

Good Morning Viet...Iran!

Hey, what's up recent Iranian visitor! I'm glad my worthless site has managed to make it past your theocratic regime's internet censors. Hey, I've got a deal for you: you send your warmongering, nuclear-posturing, religious nutbag government packing and we'll do the same here in the Ol' Great Satan. Sound like a plan to you, too? Excellent, go in peace, friend.