18 September 2006

Oh, the humanity! He's so bulgy, like a moose!

...and one for the doctor...

Exitium - Outsourcing Morality
Deepsend Records
21 March 2006
4 stars

Do you constantly wake up hating the world, feeling stiff-necked, bloated and constipated? Well, five researchers in Oklahoma have developed a temporary cure for this condition. Called Exitium, it is an American take on Scandinavian-style grind featuring lyrics that reflect an existential dis-ease within modern technological society. Veined by elements of death metal and thrash, this material races through blast beats and riff torrents to get you banging your head and shitting yourself again. The production is clean for a grind record, so it goes down with the deathy smoothness of Arsis while it retains the punishing power of Nasum.

Exitium is quite potent material. However, with twelve tracks coming in at just over 26 minutes, it is a bit brief. Despite this those who take Exitium report that the sensation that one has just been pulverized to a fine dust tends to linger. While study participants have revealed feeling a bit muddled at first, they report that it starts to catch quickly and you realize you're incontinently rocking out within minutes.

If this sounds right to you, ask your doctor about Exitium.


Warning: Extended exposure to Exitium can result in dizziness, dry mouth, headaches, bloody diarrhea, and the distinct feeling that you have been lied to since birth by institutions dedicated to the enslavement of humanity.

12 September 2006

Blood Mountain Day

For pete's sake go out and grab the new Mastodon if you haven't already. I know it's on a major label and I know they're gonna be huge (well, I mean, relatively speaking...they were in the NY Times yesterday). But seriously, it's fucking great and their show with Converge last Friday at Webster Hall was also monolithic. Okay, so I've seen better Converge sets, but their new stuff sounds pretty good, especially whatever the hell Ben is doing back there. Imagine the possibilities, for a second, of a Brann Dailor/Ben Koller love child? I'll stop right there.

Yeah, this is kind of a cheapo post, but I've been busy and not posting, so I figured I'd just let ya know I'm not dead.